A to Z Challenge: O is for Overwhelmed - Plus a Cover Reveal!

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Today’s an emotion day!   

__________

O is for Overwhelmed:  to be excessively or completely overcome or overpowered in mind, feeling, body, or spirit.

This is a widely used emotion in fiction.  After all, if a character is overwhelmed by his circumstances, he’s bound to experience tension and conflict, the key ingredients in every work of fiction.  But people react to this emotion in various ways. 

Some show no outward signs and keep their resulting emotions hidden, and that’s the key, really.  Being overwhelmed is not so much the emotion itself, but rather that which incites what overtakes us, like fear and anxiety or love and tranquility.

While there are many actions to show how a character physically experiences being overwhelmed, many feel cliché and overused like shaking all over or the character's arms curling his body.  I think, since the impact of this emotion is so internal and visceral, a more effective way to show it is to really get into the character’s head as they pace around, mumbling and contemplating the repercussions or circumstances that have overwhelmed them.

In my own novel, The Mistaken, the main character deliberates the serious ramifications of his violent actions.  (Edited for length.)

I paced the floor around me, unable—perhaps unwilling—to process the reality of what I had just done...the severity of the mistake I had made, and the dire consequences that now faced me, my brother, and the wounded woman cowering in fear and humiliation in the corner. The reality was that through the hazy cloud of alcohol and pills, I believed delivering a degrading punishment would somehow empower me, fulfill my need for revenge, and expunge the hate, grief, and rage that filled me. I thought my mind might be rewarded with a sense of balance, my soul a thread of justice, and my heart a measure of peace.

But I despised myself for the act...I could not have sunk any lower had I taken a human life with my bare hands...I was an abomination, a monster...

Whoever said vengeance is sweet was wrong. It’s the thought of vengeance—filtered through memories that haunt and torment—that is sweet. Not the act itself. The act is vile and bitter, and I felt physically ill as it filled me, as I realized...the pain, fear, and humiliation I had caused.

So while there is a vast array of ways to tangibly express being overwhelmed—scrubbing a hand down the face, staring and pacing, collapsing to the floor and squeezing the eyes tight, or pressing shaky fingers to the mouth—and these should be used to show a character’s physical response, consider the impact to his psyche, how he internalizes his emotion, because that is essentially where he’s experiencing the brunt of his overwhelming circumstances.

How do you react when you are overwhelmed?

__________

COVER REVEAL!

"First Born"

by Tricia Zoeller

Releases May 10, 2013

Cover art by

Claudia at Phatpuppy &

Ashley at Bookish Brunette Designs

Mini Blurb:

"With the police and a killer hot on her trail, can shapeshifter Lily Moore solve the mystery of being First Born or will family secrets prove deadly?" 

Find Tricia Zoeller here:

Webpage    Facebook   Twitter   Goodreads

Click here to add First Born on your Goodreads TBR

A to Z Challenge: N is for Nervous

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Today’s an emotion day!   

__________

N is for Nervous:  highly excitable, unnaturally or acutely uneasy or apprehensive; anxious; unsettled.

We’ve all been here, so we know how it feels.  But we also each experience it in different ways, so, as writers, how do we show it?  I had to tackle this one a few times in The Mistaken, and found, along with showing the physical signs, it worked better, felt more tangible, when I focused on the reason behind the character’s nervousness. 

What did he fear?  What was he risking?  That’s what drives anxiety, right?—the repercussions of failure, of exposure, of our inadequacies, or perhaps just plain old fear, especially what is unknown.  So, if all of a sudden, your character is thrust into a situation in which he has no or very little control, have him ponder the consequences should he fail.

Will he die or suffer physically, or will someone else he cares about?  Will he lose something or someone he loves or values?  Will another judge him harshly, or worse, reject him, possibly subjecting him to ridicule?  Does he fear the world will find him lacking or someone he’s tried hard not to be?

If you exacerbate his anxiety with fallout should his fear be realized, the reader will moan and groan in protest or cringe in sympathy.  Of course, in addition to spelling out this potential aftermath, you should show the reader what is going on inside his head, inside his body, as he ponders his fate.  Think about how you act when you’re nervous.

Your heart twitters and speeds up and almost feels like it’s in your throat.  You pace and move around, biting your nails, fidgeting with your fingers, or anything else you can get your hands on.  You cover your eyes or pull at your hair, your breathing quickens, you shake and twitch, bounce and jerk all around, you sweat and flush and stutter, maybe laugh inappropriately, followed by speed-talking or an abrupt change in the subject.  Your stomach tenses and burns and roils in nausea.  And if it all becomes too much, too unbearable, you might become light-headed or even pass out, that is if you haven’t fled already.

How does your body react when you’re nervous?

A to Z Challenge: M is for Motivation

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Okay, so today’s less a grammar day and more a writing day.  Sue me!   

__________

M is for Motivation:  the act or instance of causing or providing a reason for a person to perform in a certain way

When writing a novel, motivation is key to not only propelling the story forward, but to also drawing the reader into it.  It gives reason to why the character makes certain choices, and it is these choices that get him into trouble, and why the reader comes to care for him. 

For me, it was this choice, the character’s motivation, that drove me to write my book, The Mistaken.  I wondered what could make a good man choose to commit a violent crime.  The possibilities were endless, of course, but for me, it was personal.  I needed direct answers to my own questions, to explain why certain things had happened to me.

Motivation defines the character and molds the plot.  The author provides a situation that will stimulate the character’s response.  He imagines what he would do when put in their position.  If the motivation is realistic and fully fleshed out, it becomes understandable, and the character becomes believable and justified, no matter how poor his choices are.  

There are so many motivations typically used in literature—a noble goal, the desire to return home, glory, greed, to live out a dream or experience an adventure, freedom, justice.  In my novel, the motivation was two-fold—first revenge, then redemption. 

I had to make the reader understand why the protagonist would be willing to commit such a vicious offense in the name of revenge.  Then, after he’s crossed over to the dark side, I had to make the reader still care enough for him to see him through to his redemption.  Not an easy task, because he does a VERY bad thing. 

I think the writer needs to approach motivation like Method acting and essentially immerse themselves in the story and become the character.  In the end, understanding the motivation behind my character's deeds help me understand then accept experiences in my own life. 

A to Z Challenge: L is for Loneliness

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Today’s an emotion day. 

__________

L is for Loneliness:  affected with, characterized by, or causing a depressing feeling of being alone; destitute of sympathetic or friendly companionship; isolated.

I had to write about this emotion a great deal in my own novel, The Mistaken.  The main character’s wife dies and he feels responsible.  Immediately after, he isolates himself, even when there are many people around him, his friends, his family.  No one can take the place of the one he loved most.  A lot of the time, that’s how loneliness works.  I wrote a short passage at the end that deals with this feeling:

“It was disconcerting to be among all that was so familiar yet feel that the heart that beat within my chest was not actually my own.  I was lost, like a child separated from a parent in a large crowd.  Not alone, yet quintessentially lonely.”

And in the middle of the book, when the sight of another woman makes him miss the one he’s lost:

“I spent more than a small amount of time propped up against the wall, watching her, studying her face, so beautiful, so peaceful in sleep.  I knew I shouldn’t be watching her without her knowledge, but I missed having that kind of beauty near me.  Having it so close, yet knowing it was not mine, was a bitter pill, but I felt as if I’d been pulled back through time, back to when Jillian was still alive.  I was unbearably lonely, and, at that moment, Hannah filled me in ways Jillian once had.  It was difficult to turn away from something as alluring as that.”     

This shows how loneliness is not about solitude, but rather about isolation, feeling separate, emotionally divided from the whole.  A character can be in a room full of his friends and family while they festively celebrate a momentous occasion, a birthday, a wedding, yet even among all these people, who likely love and care for him, as the very symbols of happiness swirl around him, he feels the most lonely. 

This type of contrast in imagery and emotion can be very effective and relieve the writer from having to rely on clichéd and overused body language.

A to Z Challenge: K is for...Kidnapped

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Here’s the thing: I couldn’t figure out a topic for emotion or grammar that began with K,

so I thought I’d go a little off course.  But if that’s not good enough, you could always go to my

K post from last year.  Either way, I appreciate your indulgence. 

__________

K is for Kidnapped:  to steal, carry off, or abduct by force or fraud, especially for use as a hostage or to extract ransom.

I’m sure you’re wondering why I picked kidnapped.  Well, if you haven’t yet read my book, The Mistaken, then you might not know it’s a huge part of the story.  Funny thing is, the hard part of pulling that off was making the reader sympathize with a protagonist who commits such a heinous act, not to mention quite a few others.  But, I must have done a decent enough job because…

Not only is The Mistaken still loitering in Amazon’s Top Rated in Romantic Suspense, it’s also ranked fourth on Goodreads’ Kidnapped list, along with CJ Roberts’ Dark Duet Series and Lucy Christopher’s Stolen, all of which I enjoyed.

I’d love to have your support, too, so if you’re a Goodreads member, feel free to sign in and hit the "vote for this book" button.

Thank you!  Thank you verra much!

A to Z Challenge: J is for Jealousy AND the Cover Reveal for Dana Mason's Precious Embrace

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Today’s an emotion day!

__________

J is for jealousy:  a feeling of resentment against someone because of that person’s rivalry, success, or advantage, or against that success or advantage itself; mental uneasiness or fear of rivalry or unfaithfulness.

Jealousy is based in insecurity.  We fear losing something, or not having something someone else has.  Jealousy is unhealthy and all-consuming.  It makes people irrational and ill-content.  It’s different from envy, in that envy is all about coveting, whereas jealously is about fear and animosity. 

When showing a character’s jealousy, it’s best to rely on concrete details, focusing not just on what she is jealous of, but why.  So instead of simply telling the reader that Karen is jealous of her boyfriend’s old girlfriends, show why they threaten her, what exactly it is she fears, her own insecurities and confusion about herself, and how she believes the other women outweigh her in ways she might be lacking.  It’s all about comparison.

Having said that, most people don’t want others to know when they’re jealous, so the character has to exhibit physical signs that show her hostility to the reader.  Because jealousy is a defensive mechanism, use the character’s body language to express that, like crossing her arms over her chest, or scowling and sneering as she puckers her lips, swearing ugly insults or criticisms.  But inside, her stomach is tied in knots or filled with anxious foreboding, so she vows to get even and somehow make her rival appear ugly or obscene.

No matter what the character is jealous of, it’s her fear that should be concentrated on and how that fear diminishes herself in her own eyes.

__________

COVER REVEAL!

Cover design by Okay Creations

Book Two in the Embrace Series

Coming July 11, 2013

“A new love, a missing child, a family found.”

Blurb:

A second divorce and a new baby wasn’t the vision Alison Hayes had for her future. Now a single mother with two young boys, she wants to focus on her kids and what’s left of her stagnant career.

When Detective Johnny Rhay Bennett breezes into her life with his country-boy accent, she wants to run. She doesn’t need another man in her life, or another reason to make people talk. But when her worst nightmare becomes a reality, Johnny is the only person who can pull Ali out of her despair, forcing her to stay strong and not give up hope of finding her missing child.

~~~

Who falls in love after a one-night stand? Johnny Rhay doesn’t believe it’s possible until it happens to him. With Nashville in his rear-view mirror, he’s determined to convince Alison she loves him, too, even if it means moving to the West Coast.

Ali’s not easy, and she’s living on just this side of bitter after her divorce, but Johnny doesn’t care. He’s up for the challenge. At least, he believes he’s up for it, until baby Micah is stolen right out from under his nose. Now Johnny has to keep it together and get that sweet little boy home safe before his dreams of having a family vanish, too. 

Find Book One, Dangerous Embrace, on:

Goodreads   Amazon  Amazon UK   Barnes and Noble   Kobo   iBooks

My pub-sister, Dana Mason, started writing to prove to her computer geek husband and her math and science geek kids that she actually has a brain; it’s just a right functioning brain instead of a left. She’s lived all over the country and uses that experience in her writing and character studies. 

Her debut novel, Dangerous Embrace is the first in a contemporary romance series about a group of friends from Northern California who learn just how short life can be when you don’t hold on to what’s important.

When not writing, Dana specializes in professional development and training. She’s also a board member on the local Art’s Council and does what she can to support the art community

Find Dana here:

Website   Facebook   Twitter   Amazon   Publisher

A to Z Challenge: I is for Incidental Action

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Today’s a grammar day...well, sorta.

__________

I is for incidental action:  in fiction, an action happening in connection with or resulting from something more important;

While every novel should be filled with action, what often makes the story come alive and feel real—like we’re watching a movie in our heads—is the incidental action.  If there is no incidental action, the story feels flat and jerky as the narration moves from one big sequence to another.

Incidental action is the small movements typically shown between lines of dialogue.  Take this short clip from a scene in my novel, The Mistaken, for example:

Tyler stared at him for a moment before raising his chin in understanding.  He was instantly in Nick’s face, pointing his finger in warning.

“You stay of it, Nick.  I mean it. This is none of your business or your concern,”

Nick pushed his brother’s hand away.  “I’d be careful if I were you, brother.  I’m no longer that weak boy who followed you around like a lost puppy.”

Tyler reacted swiftly, surging forward and pushing Nick back against the wall.  His lips were pressed together in an angry line and he spoke through clenched teeth.

“You stay the hell out of my affairs, you hear me?  And stay away from my wife!  She doesn’t need your kind of help.”

They stood facing each other, nose-to-nose.  Ty’s face twisted in anger, but Nick looked unfazed, even amused, a smirk pulling up along one side of his mouth.

The staring, the pointing, the pushing, along with all the facial expressions, bring the scene to life.  If all you had was the dialogue, it would feel rather bland and passive. The reader needs all the small movements to see the story progress physically in their mind.  

If there were no incidental action, the progression within and between each scene would feel abrupt and jarring without any way to visualize what the characters are doing as they speak or how they move from place to place.   

Incidental action also helps the reader keep track of who’s speaking without a boat load of dialogue tags to slow it all down.  BUT—and this is big but—do NOT use incidental action as a dialogue tag.  That is, each action must be a complete sentence with the first word capped and punctuation at the end—a period, exclamation point, or question mark.  No exceptions.  Dialogue tags are he said, she replied, they screamed, we moaned, etc., and are also meant to help the reader keep track of who’s speaking, but they are not incidental action.

A to Z Challenge: H is for Hatred

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Today’s an emotion day!

__________

H is for hatred:  the feeling of disliking intensely or passionately; to feel extreme aversion for or hostility toward; to detest.

In order to experience hatred, we must first experience love.  The two go hand in hand.  Each are felt at the most visceral level possible.  But, as we age, the intensity of each mellows as we come to understand the complexity of what drives these feelings.  The two become less black and white and more varying shades of grey.  Therefore, hatred expressed in a Young Adult novel will seem more extreme than in an adult genre.

But, no matter the degree to which we feel hatred, it is still consuming.  It festers like a virus, growing, mutating, destroying the good that surrounds it.  Considering how inherent hatred is, it seems like it should be an easy emotion to write, to show, but I’ve found many authors fall back on overused, flat descriptions, or by simply having their character spew the words, “I hate you!”

Thing is, people don’t like to be caught hating.  It comes off as childish and undisciplined for an adult to shake their fist at someone, to spit while screaming, their nostrils flaring and their teeth snarling.  I prefer a more subtle approach. 

If the target of the character’s hatred is present, then, as his heart thrashes and his breathing quickens, only to be caught painfully in his chest, have him stare fiercely with hooded eyes, his jaw clenched, his shoulders rigid, and his neck knotted with tension.  Maybe have him mumble an insult or clearly word something then stomp off without giving his enemy the opportunity to engage.

And in the background, as common sense wanes and senseless contempt grows, show the character’s fixation as he works passively against his enemy.  Have him spread rumors, turn his friends against him, or sabotage him at work, school, or in a social situation, bringing humiliation, shame, and ridicule from all sides, all of which bring his enemy a sense of excitement, especially if he understands all that’s at stake.

A to Z Challenge: G is for Grief

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Today’s an emotion day!

__________

G is for grief:  keen mental suffering or distress over affliction or loss; sharp sorrow; painful regret.

Grief is a powerful emotion, and, when done well, is palpable for the reader.  I used it extensively in my novel, The Mistaken.  It was the perfect vehicle for moving my plot forward: 

Tyler’s wife is killed.  In unbearable pain, he seeks revenge and uses that as a means to free his brother from the Russian mafia.  He makes poor choices, things go very wrong, and all hell breaks loose. 

The key to sharing the character’s grief is making the reader care about him first.  That requires time, building a relationship, creating depth and layers, making him happy, learning what and whom he cares about most.  Then when that’s all taken away—bam!—we actually feel his pain.

At this point, all he wants is to be left alone, but that won’t work.  You have to stir the pot, have another character confront him with his grief, pulling it out for all to see and feel.  But even then, you have to make his suffering worse, hit him while he’s down, not allow him the time or space to heal.  It’s a low blow, but tragedy is unpredictable and often comes in multiples, and it’s in these multiple ways we see, feel, and experience the near-destruction of our character.

At his point, give him a way to deal with his pain, but not necessarily in a good way.  People often make poor choices when they’re at their lowest, so this is the perfect opportunity to add conflict and tension. 

While he tries to deal with all the turmoil of his grief and poor choices, he is bound to meet new people, folks with whom he can share his pain, who can offer a new perspective, shake things up, set him on a better path, and show him he can live again.  His life is different now, changed in ways he never wanted, but will make him feel glad that he’s alive.   

A to Z Challenge: F is for Forgiveness

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Today’s an emotion day!

__________

F is for forgiveness:  the act of giving pardon for or remission of an offense or debt; to absolve.

I was going to take the easy way out today and discuss the emotion of fear, but when I completed my first novel, The Mistaken, a strong and undeniable theme emerged, and that theme was forgiveness.  Seems I have a real issue with it, having quite a few people in my life who’ve hurt me in unspeakable ways.  And I’ve had to deal with not being forgiven myself, something which has plagued me for over twenty-eight years.  So I think I have a keen understanding of it.

It’s not an easily believable emotion to write about.  Forgiveness is something that typically comes slowly, over a relatively extended period of time.  In my novel, the protagonist cannot come to terms with the egregious consequences a stranger’s reckless act has had upon his life—the death of his pregnant wife.  He spends a great deal of time conspiring to get even.  He doesn’t begin to heal until he realizes that many of the consequences he’s suffered are due to his own shortcomings, but by that point, it’s too late, and he’s set into motion a horrifying chain of events.

And that, it seems, is the key to forgiveness, to understand not only what instigated the perpetrator to offend, but that she, the offender, is like anybody else, and, most especially, that she is like us.  So writing about forgiveness must include the entire process:  knowing all the facts and how they unfolded, understanding the motivation behind it, and acknowledging the victim's own culpability. 

This doesn’t happen easily or quickly.  People must be allowed their anger and resentment first.  Then they can be made to see that things are not always as they appear, or are as simple as black and white.  When the victim can see the enemy as human, with all the frailties that encompasses, only then can he forgive.  There must be an earnest sensitivity to the very offense she committed, as well as the offender, and her victim.  Otherwise, the act of forgiving feels far-fetched and unbelievable.

  

The act of forgiveness, or his inability to do so, often reveals qualities about the character, his substance, his deficiencies, his level of sincerity, and authenticity, all things the character must eventually be attuned to himself before he can ever move forward.  

A to Z Challenge: E is for Excitement

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Today’s an emotion day!

__________

E is for excitement:  the state of being stirred emotionally, agitated, aroused; stirred to action; a feeling of great enthusiasm or eagerness.

Excitement is the elevation of energy above what is normal, and is typically short term.  Quite simply, it’s all about anticipation, waiting for something to happen, big or small, good or bad, sexual or otherwise.  The expectation can be thrilling or dreadful. 

We generally think of excitement in positive terms, the promise of something that will no doubt lead to extreme happiness, or satisfaction at the very least.  But even so, it can lead to disappointment.  The other end of the spectrum is fear, which causes the same physical manifestations: a racing heart, constant motion, sweating, and trembling.

While it might seem relatively easy to convey excitement in a character, it’s more of a challenge to be original and avoid the cliché, like butterflies in the stomach or jumping up and down.  And simply adding exclamation points will not do the job!!!!!

You must show tangible expression of the emotion:  pacing, speed-talking, breathlessness, giddiness, hyperactivity, and the inability to calm down.  Show how the character’s face lights up, the way it affects his eyes and mouth, how his posture changes and body moves.  Most importantly, express how the outcome might change the life of the character forever.

A to Z Challenge: D is for Despair

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Today’s an emotion day!

__________

D is for despair:  the loss of hope; hopelessness; to lose, give up, or be without hope

There is probably no worse feeling than despair.  It comes in all shapes and sizes and is relative to our life experience.  I’ve certainly experienced it, but I’m sure it was nowhere near as bad as what some people live through.  Regardless, it affected me just as adversely as it would anyone else in any situation.  When hope is lost, no matter the reason, nothing else matters.

When writing about despair, which I did extensively in my novel, The Mistaken, it’s best to tackle it gradually, building it up over time, day after day, like weight being added to the character’s shoulders until he eventually breaks under the pressure.  That’s part of what makes despair so debilitating.  Everyday, you wake up realizing nothing has changed, or it’s only gotten worse, and that’s one more brick you have to carry.

You have to be concrete when writing about despair, no clichés or heavy-handed melodrama.  I found comparison works well.  Have the character reflect back on a time when life was good, when he had expectations, then show how it’s changed, what he’s lost, and how nothing will ever be the same.  Below are two short passages from my novel:

At first, it gave me some relief to savor the vision of retribution. Yet, I always woke up the next day with the realization that Erin Anderson was still alive and well, walking the earth, enjoying her life, enjoying her family, while my wife was not, while my child lay eternally buried in Jillian’s cold womb six feet beneath the heavy earth, a tiny speck of immeasurable possibility heartlessly quashed into nothingness...

... Alone now, I sat back in my chair with a full bottle of tequila and drank. With my mobile phone in hand, I played Jill’s last voicemail message on an endless loop, over and over, until I could recite it perfectly, word for word in pitch and tone...

There are many physical characteristics to show despair—rocking back and forth, hugging the body, scrubbing hands down the face, the list is endless—but one of the best ways is to have the character act out in ways he never would have otherwise, pushing him over the line. Desperation often drives people to do things they later deeply regret.

A to Z Challenge: C is for Comma - Plus the IWSG

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Today’s a grammar day!

Plus, it the first Wednesday of the month, time for
Alex J. Cavanaugh’s Insecure Writer’s Support Group.
So I'm going to kill two birds with one stone and
post about the one thing I feel totally secure about:
the use of the comma!

__________

C is for comma:  a mark of punctuation used for indicating a division in a sentence

As an editor, this is probably the one thing I see used incorrectly most often, or, more accurately, not used effectively or even at all.  A comma is used to set off words, phrases, or clauses from the rest of the sentence, especially where there needs to be a slight pause.  When we speak, we do so in fragments or clauses, and we naturally include small pauses in between these clauses.  Every where there is a pause, imagine a comma, as well.  And did you see how I added a comma before as well in the last sentence?  Well, ditto when you use the word too, too.       

They’re also used to separate items in a series or list of three items or more, even with the use of the word “and” in between.  This way, each item is given equal purpose and is not meant to be combined with the item before it.  Many do not think it’s necessary to use a comma between the second-to-last item in a list and the last, that a conjunction such as “and”, “but”, or ‘or” are all that is required.  While this is common, it’s also incorrect, as not using the comma between is like making the last two items one in conjunction with each other instead of being separate but equal.

Another place people often forget to include a comma is when two complete sentences are joined together, most often by the word “and”.  If each segment of the sentence can stand alone, then use a comma to separate them.  Also, as in this sentence, use a comma to separate or attach words in the beginning or end to the rest of the sentence.  You often see this with the use of time such as “Now” or “Later” or “Today”, but also with adverbs like “Frequently” or “Certainly” or words like “Nevertheless”.

Lastly, if you stick a dependent clause in the middle of an independent one or complete sentence, you divide it with commas on both ends. 

Commas aren’t properly taught in school these days, and we seem to have entire generations of writers who don’t understand the proper placement of commas, but if you listen to the way you speak and hear the pauses in between the clauses, then you know where to put a comma.  A good trick to find missing commas is to use the text-to-speech feature included in most word processing software.        

   

A to Z Challenge: B is for Boredom

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Today’s an emotion day!

__________

B is for boredom:  the state of being tired or distracted; to make weary by being dull, repetitious, or uninteresting; a pervasive lack of interest; an attentional lapse.

Boredom is a tough one because it’s more about what’s not being shown.  There is generally no engagement with a character who is bored.  They stare off into space with a blank face, doodle on a piece of paper, or keep checking the time.  They fidget, sigh heavily, and exhibit signs of tiredness such as slouching or yawning.  They drum their fingers and roll their eyes in impatience, because boredom is mostly about the limitation of energy, not having any way to satisfy the need to expend it.

Boredom is an emotion you want to use very sparingly as it will slow the action and tension in a scene, offering the reader a perfect place to put the book down.

A to Z Challenge: A is for Anger...AND...a Cover Reveal for Searching for Moore

Welcome to the 2013 A to Z Challenge!
First and foremost, a BIG thank you to A to Z founder, Arlee Bird.
Without you, none of this would be possible!

This year, I’m focusing on two themes:  Emotions and grammar,

depending on which letter we’re on each day.

I’ll be sharing mostly what I’ve learned about writing emotion into a novel, but I’ll also be throwing in a few key grammar lessons, pet peeves I’ve picked up while working as an editor.

Today’s an emotion day!

__________

A is for anger:  a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, hostility, or belligerence, typically aroused by a wrong.

There are many degrees of anger, and so, many ways in which to show it.  First you must figure out exactly how angry the character is.  And don’t overdo it.  Don’t use clichés such as “raging like a bull” or “angry as a wasp”.  And whatever you do, do not rely on exclamation points to get your emotion across!!!

First, try to use the character’s voice via dialogue, and I don’t mean screaming, but rather by the way he or she speaks, showing the movement from whatever emotion came prior then displaying the change, the difference in phrasing and tone in which they speak and the very words they use to do it.  This disparity will exemplify his turn in mood, as will adding certain traits we all exhibit when angered.

The obvious ones are a red face or gathering and lowering of the brow, a turned down mouth or stomping of the feet, or even a simple tensing of the body.  Using one of these with the proper words and tone is more than enough to display anger.  You can also describe a change in the eyes, how they tensed, glared, or seemed to turn hard.

Whatever physical traits and action the character models to show anger, it’s more effective to contrast it with whatever mood came before it.  And, as we all have typical ways in which we exhibit anger, be sure to be consistent with each character.

__________

But wait!  There's more!  Searching for Moore, actually.  Today is the big cover reveal for my friend and fellow author, Julie A. Richman's new novel, Searching for Moore!

Title: Searching for Moore

By: Julie A. Richman

Series: Needing Moore Series #1

Genre: Adult Romance, Chick Lit

Length: 318 Pages

Here's the lowdown: 

Attended by reality TV star wannabes and Southern California social climbers, Schooner Moore knows the party his wife is throwing for his forty-third birthday has little to do with him and everything to do with her social standing in Orange County. The evening turns out to hold more surprises than just his wife's Botoxed friends groping at his privates, when a conversation with his old college roommate, Beau, reveals the biggest surprise of the night.

Beau has had contact on Facebook with Mia Silver. Just hearing her name sends Schooner into a tailspin, as he is now just a Friend Request away from the one who got away when she disappeared without a goodbye, leaving him wondering why she left.

A serial failure at romance, Manhattan boutique ad agency owner, Mia, gets a blindside of her own when a Facebook Friend Request from first love, Schooner, appears in her email. Going with her gut reaction, Mia hits accept, propelling her past to catch up with her in a New York minute, as a forceful Schooner is determined to understand what tore them apart and to explore the possibility of a second chance at love.

From a 1980's Southern California college campus and a devastating first love to present day New York City, Searching for Moore explores how technology has eradicated the divide between our past and our present, and asks whether you would give up everything to reconnect with The One in a single keystroke?

Click here to add Searching for Moore on Goodreads

Click here to attend the Facebook Release Party

Click here to “Like” Julie’s author page

And click here to check out her website 

So...are YOU doing the A to Z?  Interested in a little Moore?